Being Me Empowered

It was an awesome day! The best part was the moving account of a revert. From being a Muslim to Hinduism to Buddhism, and then Christianity and Finally back to Islam, subhanallah. The holy ayyats :

In the name of God, the infinitely Compassionate and Merciful.
Praise be to God, Lord of all the worlds.
The Compassionate, the Merciful. Ruler on the Day of Reckoning.
You alone do we worship, and You alone do we ask for help.
Guide us on the straight path,
the path of those who have received your grace;
not the path of those who have brought down wrath, nor of those who wander astray.
Amen.

The ayyats she read one by one on a mountain all alone, while she was deciding on whether to follow the Quran or the Bible.

  Raya Shokatfard is her name. She touched our hearts, everyone of us. May all of us stay in touch with Allah t and always in rememberance of Allah t.

Today, yet another malaysian celebrity, Sofia, she now just began her journey (hijra) towards goodness, 🙂 Alhamdulillah, praise to Allah swt. may Allah t Keeps the Nur shine upon her and her family. I could see her eyes are filled with so much love. Spread love ❤

Marina Keegan

 

A 22-year-old Yale graduate, Marina Keegan, who penned her life’s lessons in a final column for the Yale Daily News, died just days after commencement. But the words of her work, “The Opposite of Loneliness,” have lived on.

Keegan’s advice was wise beyond her years. She wrote,

“What we have to remember is that we can still do anything. We can change our minds. We can start over. Get a post-bac or try writing for the first time. The notion that it’s too late to do anything is comical. It’s hilarious. We’re graduating college. We’re so young. We can’t, we MUST not lose this sense of possibility because in the end, it’s all we have.”

 

A reader comment@ http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/upshot/marina-keegan-yale-grad-final-essay-gets-life-215142327.html :

Be happy for your days. If you wanna do something in life, go and do it before you can’t.

Baby Food oh Glorious Baby Food!

http://www.annabelkarmel.com/recipes/babies-6-9-months. Love this site, yummylicious recipe for our little babies.

BEING ME : Exclusively for Women

Let’s go, here http://www.being-me.org/ for more info. This Event has only one purpose : Empowering Women. Put it, there! It will be held on Saturday 30th June, 2012 with a panel of scholars including Sis. Yasmin Mogahed (USA), Sis. Raya Shokatfard (USA) , Sheikh Tawfique Chowdhury (Australia), Dr. Hajah Sofia (Malaysia), Sis. Myriam Francois-Cerrah (UK) http://my.being-me.org/speakers-presenters/confirmed-speakers/ . This eventful programme is co-organized by Mercy Mission Malaysia. Can’t wait!!

A good one for career mommies out there!

Wednesday May 2, 2012
Maidless in PJ
By KULSANOFER SYED THAJUDEEN

A mum-of-four in Petaling Jaya, Selangor, got over her maid dependence to emerge stronger and happier running the household with her family. Here’re some tips from her.

I WAS following with great interest the unfolding maid saga that has been gaining much space in our papers recently. It seems quite clear that the average Malaysian will not be able to afford a live-in maid in the near future.

Malaysians have become a pampered lot that we must relearn to live without one. After numerous headaches, heartache and loss of thousands of ringgit, I made a conscious decision to live without one three years ago. Can you live without a maid? The answer is a resounding YES.

Paradigm shift

It was a shock, initially, for all of us, when I decided to go maidless. Having had a maid to do all the nitty-gritty work, all of a sudden everything had to be done by us.

I have four children, the youngest being a toddler and things started piling up and tempers flared. There was inertia all around. The children, especially my eldest, felt it was beneath him to do any housework.

Change in attitude was crucial to the running of the home. We had to drill into the children that it is our responsibility to maintain our home. If you see something on the floor you should pick it up and put it in its right place. Nobody is going to do it for you. It was not easy and there were times when I nearly threw in the towel but I had the support of my spouse and we stuck to our resolution.

By repeatedly reminding each other, we managed to put in systems in our home and achieve compliance from everyone after a year.

Children are an asset

Many of us do not see the potential in our children to be a substantial help in the home. They can be trained to be in charge of certain chores and with practice, they can become more efficient. Each child can be given a specific task and monitored routinely. If the task is not done, then we know exactly who did not complete the task and will be dealt with appropriately. But before I am labelled a Tiger Mother, I would like to assure all that the children are given treats for their co-operation.

Another area that children must be trained in is taking care of themselves. They must be responsible for all their things. I do not entertain questions like, “Mum, where are my boots?” I provide them all their stationery; they are expected to be ready for school and complete their schoolwork. I conduct a random audit to keep them on their toes.

I believe that involving the children in housework builds character and is an essential living skill. My next plan is to train each child to learn to cook one dish, so that they can come up with a meal as a back-up plan if I am sick or not around.

Invest in tools

Managing the household is a job like any other that requires proper tools for added efficiency. For a family of six, a good washing machine is a requisite for clothes management as it needs to handle a full load every day. Missing one day of washing spells disaster as the laundry will pile up.

Rain or shine, the laundry has to be washed and dried. A dryer is a great help, especially during the rainy season, or when you have a full-time job; you can do both the washing and drying at night.

The ironing system is truly a time-saver. The pressurised steam works wonders on creases and cuts down on the ironing time by half. Ironing is no longer a dreaded chore now. If you can afford it why not splurge on those robotic vacuum cleaners that automatically clean your home every day.

There are loads of other household appliances that can help make your life easier; the whole idea is if you can automate a process, why do it yourself!

Break into small portions

Procrastination is the thief of time! I cannot agree more. There is nothing more daunting than to look at a huge pile of clothes or dishes before you.

Set a chore every day and follow your routine religiously. If you miss a chore on Monday then do it the next Monday, don’t interrupt the routine. Doing a chore immediately also helps; for example, clean the microwave or oven immediately after use.

Multitasking

This has become a habit as I continuously try to be more productive in a day. You can clean bathrooms while you take a bath or mend clothes while watching TV.

Get help

Everyone needs help, you cannot do everything yourself. There are many companies that offer part-time maid services now. You can make use of the help to handle tougher housework like cleaning windows and ceiling fans.

Simplify your life

It really bewilders me when people complain that it is difficult to do something but they never take steps to solve the problem.

When I was faced with the problem of a messy home with toys all over the house, I decided to give away most toys and the situation became more manageable. Perhaps it is not wise to have too many knick-knacks or souvenirs that collect dust on the shelf or table.

For those who have a lawn and garden but no time to maintain it, it is better to just tile it and have a few potted plants. Simple is better because there is more to life that just maintaining the house.

Food

Having to put food on the table every day for each meal is tremendous work. Simplify it with menu-planning. With your menu planned for the week you will know exactly what to buy and there will be no wastage or running to the grocery store for supplies.

I prepare meals for a week and freeze them. This requires an organised kitchen and I cook in a very systematic manner to ensure a speedier work rate.

By preparing the food during the weekend, I do not need to think about cooking during busy workdays. You can just come home from work and pop the prepared meal in the microwave. My, the sheer pleasure of having a hot meal at the touch of a button!

Running a household is no piece of cake on top of having to mind children, help with their homework and the gazillion projects and experiments, tend to sick toddlers and work full-time. It can be done but it requires lifestyle sacrifices.

It is not really a question of whether Malaysians can live without a maid, but if we want to live without one. There are good reasons for going sans maid like not having a stranger live with you. You have privacy as a family.

Children will be more independent and responsible. They would also have more living skills, which would be beneficial when they live on their own. In my case, my family grew into a strong, mature and independent entity and we are fiercely proud of that.

Now, its 2nd May 2012, rdy!

Owh what a long break for me since iLast blog, hee. Was pretty busy for sure, time is just like a knife. Farah is a big sister to Firas, n Firas is the most loved little brother to Farah, :). Mommy, now is superbusy with the piling books @the Library, haha. Hubby, u r my other wing, it gets better each day, with all of us. I am ever so grateful to Allah t for all that u are pouring upon us, alhamdulillah. Love You o Allah!

Farah Darling

Our first born Farah I is our jewel in our hearts. She has turned three on the 2nd Oct 2010, and had her first birthday with her friends at her play school. She still remembers her Winnie the Pooh birthday cake until today. Her aunts got her 2nd barbie doll n a barbie horse toy. The first time she was introduced to barbie world when her M.Long gave Jameela doll to her (Islamic version of barbie) adorned in stylish jubah! She did play the doll for a few months. She sometimes play with her toys, and I noticed that by going to school she’s not too attached to play with her toys like I was when I was a lil kid! I think because she needs company, another sibling! And I’m pregnant now, Farah is ever so excited! I’m planning to go for a holiday this April, as she is so longing for a getaway. I think it would be the best time before come the new addition!

These days she s been asking us to bring her to the pool, i know we’ve been idle n not travelling further beyond my workplace these few months. Not even to the playground. Early phase of pregnancy has been keeping me to stay indoor and I know Farah wants to chill out. Until I m fully recovered, we’ll hit the pool,yeah!

Talk to ur heart

written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s –

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Grooming is gewd!

It is important as we are living in a society, dealing with others would include respect in each other. Would people respect us more when we are well-groomed and well-mannered with fine personality or vice versa? Let’s ponder…

Read this article, might be helpful!

Image is everything. How people view you has a lot to do with whether they want to deal with you ever again in the future or not. It all begins with how you see yourself, how you carry yourself and the general thoughts you have around where you see yourself in the context of other professionals around you. One thing is certain; the one is well groomed, well manicured, well polished tends to have more confidence, boldness and favor than one who is not. The thing is, generally people tend to know it within themselves when they have not done their best and that thought resonates in the sub conscious. It becomes the headline in the mind hence it affects everything about the person. There is however a set of professionals that have no idea what grooming is about. They tend to do what they feel is the best according to the knowledge and exposure they grew up under. They feel entitled to their choices and hence they are bold in their state of not being well groomed. They are in essence comfortable wondering why everyone looks at them funny.

Common Grooming Considerations

1. Dress – Clothing permits you are and help you to achieve your goals. Clothes affect mannerisms and a new set of reactions; both internal and external affect our behavior. Clothes should compliment you, as they should a natural extension of yourself presenting the whole of you. They should fit well, modest and appropriate according to the people you are meeting, the place of meeting, the occasion/event, the time of day or season and the weather. Clothes should have a present day look and be of good quality. Avoid tight fitting clothes and those that reveal your under garments. Have the right combination of colors. You cannot dress like a Christmas tree or rainbow. The smaller the number of colors you wear the better. Wash your clothes and iron them. Polish shoes daily and carry a little duster in your pocket or car. In general all dressing must be smart. Some environments allow professionals to wear casual clothes; no ties and jackets etc. Every work place can define the minimum expectations of employees so that people are not left guessing.

2. Smell Good – Always use a deodorant after bathing or shower. Deodorant is used to cover or mask your own body odor and is applied under the armpits on the skin. It is not meant to make you smell nice hence the reason it stops having a smell after an hour or two. Soda can be used as deodorant by mixing it with water and making it into a paste which is then applied under the arms. After masking your body, you can then apply perfume which has a stronger, long lasting sweet smell. Perfumes come in three categories; Parfum – this has the greatest concentrate and hence it is the strongest; Eau De Parfum – has a lesser concentration than Parfum and lastly Eau De Toilette – has a lesser concentrate than Eau De Parfum. Perfumes are meant to make you smell nice hence they should not be used in the absence of a deodorant. Apply perfume to the pulse points which are on the wrists or neck region. Every individual has got their own preference of how they want to smell. There are many brands you can try on the market. Always note that you can easily be swindled by traders who peddle copies of perfume that are not original. Believe me, I have been a victim once.

3. Hair (head, face, armpits) – Clean your hair regularly. It should be well cut, well braided, plaited and styled appropriately. Avoid coloring your hair with shouting colors such as pink, green etc. Avoid hairstyles that are too big and too wild or weird. The more conservative your hairstyle the better. Always clip nasal and hair that comes out of the ears. For men, always shape your beard nicely. Some prefer a clean shave which is done daily. Just ensure it is trimmed and shaped nicely. Eyebrows that are nicely defined and shaped can enhance your look and appearance. Always shave the hair in the armpits. Long hair tends to make you smelly and sweaty in the armpits. Protect the scalp of your head by shampooing to remove all dirt and then oiling or applying a scalp spray. Whenever you have lots of dandruff it is a clear sign that the scalp is not well maintained.

4. Hand and Nails – Your hands should always be clean. The reason we wash hands before touching foot is because they carry a lot of germs because of the many things we touch daily, computer, cash, other hands etc. Nails should generally short for men. For ladies, nails can be short or reasonably long, clean and well presented. I painted, please use colors that do not shout such as earth colors or pinks that are close to your natural nail color. Once your nail polish chips remove it immediately or reapply. Chipped nail polish shows you do not pay attention to detail. Long nails tend to keep a lot of dirt and germs hence the need to regularly attend to the portion of the nails which extends out. Your palm is used to greet others; always apply sanitizer and hand lotion so that your hands are not scratching other. Sanitizer destroys all germs

5. Accessories – These are not mandatory but they enhance your look considerably. As a rule of thumb, avoid over dressing by putting on too many accessories. Accessories include necklace, ear rings, watch, bangles, fashion rings, belts. It is better not to have accessories than buy cheap imitations. Good accessories should accompany clothes. Socks must match either the shoes or clothes you are wearing. White socks must be avoided and worn with sports gear. Belts should generally be leather and of a good quality. Recommended colors are black and dark brown. The belt should match the shoes you are wearing. Any form of piercing on the nose, tongue and ear with the goal of putting accessories should avoided by professionals. For ladies, you can have clip on ear rings instead of piercing your ears. I have seen the horror that people go through with piercing, what is worse is when the metallic objects begin to react inside your ear. In some instances the piercing becomes wider and wider making the ear look deformed.

6. Makeup & Tattoos – As a professional you should always ensure your makeup is conservative. Usually the ladies apply more makeup than men. There is nothing wrong with men applying makeup. Makeup enhances and brightens the face and in some cases it removes marks and obvious defects. Apply makeup that is not shouting but complimenting your skin complexion. Ask the specialists concerning which colors compliment your skin. People of color generally have specific ranges that are a lot different from those applied by fair skinned people. Tattoos are to be avoided as much as possible especially on parts of the body that are exposed to the outside world. Tattoos are permanent marks hence the need to be cautious about living your whole life with a mark you may one day wish you didn’t have.

7. Greetings and handshakes – One thing you will have to get used to is the issue of greetings and how to handle handshakes. As a professional you will always be meeting different people in meetings, customers, supplier and all the relevant stakeholders in your organization. My advice on this is to avoid handshakes and greet with your mouth as much as possible. It is not only hygienic but there are cultures that are offended when you shake their hands. If a hand is extended to you, by all means comply and shake the other party’s hand. As a professional always endeavor to greet the person in a formal manner not using slang or native languages. In your initial statements you are able to establish the language preference of the person you are meeting. Always be quick to switch and exercise situational sensitivity to the one you are talking to.

8. Facial Expression & Facial Cleansing – In the workplace setting, as you meet stakeholders, it is wise to wear a smile all the time. Smiles are contagious. They tend to hide the personal issues one maybe going through. Frowning at people because of the personal issues you are going through will never solve the issues. Everyone has issues and the best thing you can ever do is deal with your own issues privately and appear like you have no issues. Have a positive outlook that encourages customers and employees to work with you and stick around you. No one ever wants to stick around gloomy people. Your face accumulates dead cells like every other part of the body. There are facial masks, cleansers and toners you can use to cleanse your face regularly so that your face keeps looking younger longer. Sometimes people lose their original complexion as the faces would be in a state of neglect. A whole set of cleanser, mask, toner and moisturizer will cost you no more an $50 and this may last you many months. Again you use a range that best fits your facial complexion and skin type.

9. Posture & Deportment Management – Standing, Walking and Sitting. Deportment refers to the manner of acting with respect to the courtesies and duties of life, behavior and conduct. Posture refers to the position or arrangement of the body and its limbs. Avoid slouching when standing. Stand up straight, feet in an outward position, one foot in front of the other and shoulder width apart. This helps you to keep a balance at all times. When you walk, you need to have shoulders back, stomach in and chin always parallel to the ground. Always start walking with the front foot, walk from the hip and not from the shoulders. Head and shoulders must be relaxed. Keep arms close to your side with main movement from the elbow downwards. When sitting, you need to ensure that your back is straight. Ladies should sit with legs crossed and hands crossed comfortably resting on each leg.

10. General Hygiene – Hygiene refers to the science concerned with prevention of illness and maintenance of health or a condition promoting sanitary practices “personal hygiene”. Brush your teeth with toothpaste at least twice daily; in the morning and before going to bed. I personally store a toothbrush and toothpaste in my office hence I have added a third time of brushing my teeth. Rinse your mouth after meals or suck on a mint. I find that helpful. You can also carry mouthwash in your car or office. Avoid foods that are smelly like garlic, raw onion etc during the course of the day. Bath the body with soap at least once daily. Some bath twice daily which is also good, in the morning and before going to bed. After bathing, use lotion to avoid dry chapped skin. Cover your body with the lotion. It also helps to close open pores.

Rabison Shumba is a writer, businessman and philanthropist. Writer of the book The Greatness Manual which you can preview on http://greatnessmanual.wordpress.com. Founder and CEO of Infotech Solutions and Greatness Factory Trust. Rabison speaks about success, leadership, motivation and inspiration. His trust works with disadvantaged school children supporting them with school fees and general livelihood. He also helps to network artists (musicians of all genres) to facilitate information sharing and building of future celebrities. Rabison is well traveled having been to Asia, America, United Kingdom and all over Africa. He is married to Jacqueline Edwards and they have two children. They reside in Harare, Zimbabwe, Southern Africa.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rabison_Shumba

Imam Muda: a big hit tv programme

Assalaamua’alaikum,

Alhamdulillah3, in the midst of the rush of people looking for the meaning of life, or in the other hand , in the midst of the chaotic world of distracted soul, a tv program food for the soul which had touch us in the heart, came to the rescue so that we shall be transported back to the right path. We are easily get drifted away with the worldly attractions causing polluted minds and unbecoming behaviors, and with the birth of this programme , more or less came knocking at the door of our soul to realize about where should we go from here. Watch Imam Muda here http://www.youtube.com/user/iamyiwern